A man sat silently on a rocky point over looking the ocean at high tide during a thunder storm. To the out side observer he may look deranged but to anyone who could read his thoughts, they would have seen a mind deep in thought about a friendship and relationship lost perhaps no one but him and her really knew that answer. It was not something regular folks could do but for some reason you are able to hear what he is thinking.
The Words where always there just never the right timing. So we began to drift apart as our thoughts of each other separated into two individuals again, so did we. Like two ships lashed together drifting as ropes unravel and snap.
I never regretted knowing you; I don’t regret our friendship either. You have taught me so much that I cannot comprehend how little I would have known if it wasn’t for your inspirations you provide every time we hang out. The sounds of the music you play the sweet smells of burning cannabis of all types and all the business ideas.
I’m never really sure why we drifted apart so much but I have a feeling it’s my fault. I just should have paid more attention or maybe not. I’m too caught up in being a success for myself and because it just feels right to chase after my personal dreams at this point in life. You always seemed to respect my personal drive to better the world around me for everyone.
I wonder what could have been, sometimes when I’m lonely for someone. You and I had some really fun times just doing nothing and hanging out. I remember it all so clearly. I’m glad it’s mostly out of my system. I’m not sure because I never want to really ask this question but I like to think as a matter of personal preservation we would have had no future anyway as more then friends. I have never moved on yet and I am just out there being a complete asshole right now but I found some new women to chill with.
I just thought you should know that I never meant for bad things to happen. They just did and that’s life when two people aren’t ready for one moment that’s spectacularly disappointing or awesome because of the fear of the unknown and unknowable future. That’s the funny thing about the future it’s almost impossible to predict and you just kind of have to experience it my dear sweet beauty. Thank you for making me more honest through all this.
It’s almost July now the sun is full beam on my tanned skin. I have been living outdoors and don’t mind it one bit but am looking for a new place now. I hope when I get it you will come hang out so we can talk for a bit and maybe watch some movies. I’m not sure how you felt about them but all those times watching movies with you was time well spent.
I feel it’s not fair to our friendship to be awkward with each other we both know they broke each of our molds the minute we were made. I’m surprised some days they let two powerful creatures off the drawing board and passed inspection but that is biology for you. We clumsily make our way through life swatting at flies without realizing we just knocked over a whole house. The last thing we would need to destroy such a fun friendship is to never admit we are both awkward people to each other.
Let us fly off the handle and never return these are my thoughts of you.
With that the man stopped thinking for the night and placed his hands below his head for a pillow as he drifted off to sleep dreaming of all people he had met and loved as friends and in some cases more than friends. It was one of the best sleeps he had all year content in his contemplation